I hate them because I love them so much

I'm trying to quit smoking and I HATE IT!!! I'm so much happier though, in general, when I don't smoke.

Cigarettes are the battle of my life. When I smoke I'm the craziest chainsmoker you'll ever meet. I feel so not in control when it comes to smoking, that I end up feeling like such a slave. I hate cigarettes because I love them so much.

So, it feels like I am constantly quitting, especially lately. I've probably quit six times, at least, in the last three months. I quit once for five years, when I was married, but when we split up I got this crazy idea that went like this: "I'm single - I can do whatever the hell I want!" And there I was - chainsmokin' again.

This time I have a couple people quitting with me, so I'm hoping that will help. ;)

I wish I could find a counter that says "I haven't smoked for __ days." If you see anything like that, please let me know. And wish me luck - I'll need it! ;)

If you love smoking, and don't hate it at all, then by all means enjoy!

Too much fun!

Too much fun with the girls (and guys) on girls night! ;) I'm so happy to have this crew! We've been together for over a decade and it's been such an amazing experience, growing and learning together. ;)

And the partyin' is fun too!

It's just what we need!! ;)

Belt of Venus

I thought this was interesting - I never knew! ;)

The Belt of Venus over Elwood Beach

Credit & Copyright: Russell Cockman

Explanation: Although you've surely seen it, you might not have noticed it. During a cloudless twilight, just before sunrise or after sunset, part of the atmosphere above the horizon appears slightly off-color, slightly pink. Called the Belt of Venus, this off-color band between the dark eclipsed sky and the blue sky can be seen in nearly every direction including that opposite the Sun. Straight above, blue sky is normal sunlight reflecting off the atmosphere. In the Belt of Venus, however, the atmosphere reflects light from the setting (or rising) Sun which appears more red. The Belt of Venus can be seen from any location with a clear horizon. Pictured above, the Belt of Venus was photographed behind Elwood Beach in Melbourne, Australia. The belt is frequently caught by accident in other photographs.

Finally...

The last month (or so) has been crazier than crazy - a rollercoaster ride of emotions. I learned a lot about myself during this time, things I'm sure I've learned before but forgot. Things I've been told before, but didn't quite believe. I learned them so thoroughly this time - more thoroughly than ever before (at least it feels that way now) - that I am hopeful I won't have to learn them again.

Finally I feel relaxed, like everything will be okay. Like I don't have to have my heart tearing out of my chest just to feel like something's happening... I'm finally starting to feel sane.